An Open Letter on Sexuality

Dear homosexual, gay or lesbian, bisexual, queer, or anyone who may feel judged by me on issues of sexuality (heterosexuals too):

I'm writing this to let you know that I love you. Really. There's a lot of hate going around, and sometimes, the things I say might offend you.

You are not a sin. Your sexuality is a part of your identity? Well, you are fearfully and wonderfully made. Your identity is not a sin. You are not hated.

I love you.

Your attractions, your feelings, your body chemistry - that's you. God loves you. I love you.

I love you enough to risk our relationship.

I love you enough that while I remind you that you are God's creation, and it's you that I love, I still can't call something other than what it is.

Sexuality is not a sin, but our use of sexuality can be. I love you enough to stand up and say that God's plan for sex is within marriage, and God's plan for marriage is heterosexual.

I love you enough to get called intolerant, or a bigot. I love you enough to be called out-of-touch, or stupid, even by heterosexual couples who don't get married (it's not a sexuality issue. It's a use-of-sex issue. Sex outside of marraige is sin). I love you enough to say that legally, your relationships should probably have equal rights for taxes and such, while at the same time saying that I can't bless your relationship as a marriage, and I can't condone sexual activity outside of marriage. I love you enough to offend you, to be called a hypocrite, to be hated by you, or pitited by you.

I won't love you so little as to lie to you and say it's OK. I won't pretend, just so our relationship is easier. You are valuable. Your love is valuable. You are called to the same standard as every human, by God. That must be hard for you, and I don't know what it's like for you. But I do know that I love you, and that I'm here, if you'll have me here. I can't make it better - no one can. Jesus is with us, even when life makes no sense, and there is suffering - perhaps especially there.

I love you and want to be in community with you. I want to laugh with you, share with you, and encourage you. I love you too much to lie to you. I love you too much to put myself first, and say things that aren't true just so you or someone else won't think bad thoughts about me. I love you enough to proclaim God's Law and God's Gospel, to stand alongside you when we both fail, to come alongside you when God forgives us, and to struggle through this life with you.

I love you enough to proclaim to you the entire forgiveness of all your sins in Jesus Christ, and enough to ask you to seek Him. I love you enough to ask you to remind me of my sin, and to proclaim to me the forgiveness in Christ.

If I call something you do a sin, it's never because I don't love you. If I didn't love you, it would be easier for me to just let it go. I don't love my sin. I don't love your sin. I don't love any sin (or, at least I don't want to) - and you, yourself, are not a sin. Remember that.

Remember that I love you.

Remember that God loves you.